Internal Family Systems Therapy
"Every time I have a dark, sad feeling I reassure my young part within and I am able to deal with whatever comes up. It is quite miraculous! I'm certain it's led to so much movement for me."
Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy is a powerfully transformative, evidence-based, trauma-informed approach that has gained much popularity around the world because of its effectiveness and techniques that often lead to deep healing and lasting change. IFS is a non-pathologizing, compassionate and respectful approach to unlocking and healing our minds. In IFS we believe the mind is naturally multiple and that this is a good thing.
What can IFS help me with?
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anxiety and depression
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trauma
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adverse childhood experiences
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addictions, cravings and compulsions
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hyper‐vigilance and panic
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illness and pains
What are the unique benefits of IFS?
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Feeling more balanced and confident
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Easier relationships
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Greater ability to regulate emotions
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More acceptance and self-compassion
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Easier decision making
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Improved health
All parts are welcome
In IFS we believe the mind is naturally multiple and that this is a good thing. We all have different aspects to our personality and all these parts and their experiences are welcome. Deep down these different parts are all trying to help and often bring positive qualities. They have their roles, behaviours, needs and reasons why they do what they do.
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Our proactive parts focus on functioning and learning, leaving us struggling with issues like perfectionism, self-criticism and shame.
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Our reactive parts come out in behaviours such as excessively blaming others, over-eating or excessive drinking, where we attempt to dampen down difficult emotions.
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Our injured parts carry painful beliefs, trauma sensations and feelings, often hidden away from our conscious mind.
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Parts can also show up in our body as health symptoms.
“Perhaps everything terrible is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love.” (R. M. Rilke)
Accessing our innate, inner resources
We can all access our innate inner wisdom, our core true Self, and our natural ability to be compassionate, clear and connected. The capacity to be with our experiences in an open-hearted way may not be immediately available to us but IFS therapy guides us to develop that. From this calmer and more mindful place, we learn to relate to ourselves with more confidence and curiosity.
Befriending and helping our protective and vulnerable parts
IFS focuses on building relationships with different aspects of our personalities, helping them to transform and heal. As we get to know our protective parts, listening to their emotions and beliefs and how they feel in the body with genuine interest and care, they begin to work less hard and trust more. Their coping strategies become less extreme or transform completely. Other more vulnerable parts are helped to safely let go of their difficult emotions and negative beliefs and to heal.
Changes we start to see
As we continue giving our system of parts compassionate and patient attention, we begin to experience more harmony, ease and connectedness internally and in our relationships with others and the world. For example, we become less self-critical or fearful of being abandoned by others. Or on the outside we change to being less judgmental or shy.
As some of our parts become less vulnerable, isolated or overwhelmed, others will reliquish their control, tendency to be critical or impulsive. All parts begin to collaborate with each other and be more in touch with their own strengths. Growing our ability to be more creative, confident and calmer with our parts often also leads to improvements in our external relationships.
By valuing our parts and creating more trusting relationships with them and between them, we help them to resolve their internal conflict. We begin to experience more balance, joy and connectedness internally and move with more grace and ease in the world. We discover tools to empower ourselves and transform our lives. We start to feel freer and more peaceful.
This process puts YOU, the client in charge – and gives you the tools to understand yourself, so that you are not dependent on the therapist, or a system of interpretation.
As a counsellor trained in various modalities, I can guide you to explore your parts in different ways, depending on your needs and wishes on the day. Please check out the therapies I offer.
Tools to get to know your parts and Self can include:
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talking about parts
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dialoguing with parts
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internally attuning and getting to know parts with imagination and in the body
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movement and voice
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drawing-mapping parts, sand-tray or other creative expression
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mindfulness and self-compassion practices
Pricing:
The cost of a 1-hour session is on a sliding scale of £65/£60/£55 depending on your circumstances. £50 for trainee counsellors.
To book an initial free 15-minute introductory Zoom call please email me, stating whether you are looking for online or in-person work and where you are located if you want face-to-face sessions: compassionatetherapies21@gmail.com
In this call, we will explore what brings you to therapy, how I work and if working together is right for us.
I am the co-founder of the social enterprise Ecotherapy East, based in Suffolk, which is committed to increasing biodiversity and creating a nature reserve on the 12-acre meadow we steward as a community. By investing in the work with me, you are also supporting the ecosystems and over 500 young trees we take care of.
My work also supports: Greenpeace, Friends of the Earth, Avaaz and WaterAid.